Distortionary Dialogues

Questions and quandaries to catalyze abstract or atypical thinking. All manner of responses welcomed.


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"Tweet-Sized Thoughts" circa 2013 (excerpts)

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1 "Tweet-Sized Thoughts" circa 2013 (excerpts) on Thu May 24, 2018 8:05 pm

if even a fraction of the boredom, shame, and embarrassment that i feel in writing this piece is transferred to its reader, then my point will have been proven.

when i get my own place i'm going to break all the mirrors and hire a person to shave me a few times a week who will live in the basement. we will develop an incredibly close, intimate non-sexual relationship and gradually...

throwback thursday to when i was too young to know everything that is wrong with me

how do you perform your happiness?

i am man, composer of emails

tell that to the idiot that runs my sleep schedule

debug me

i am becoming merely a vocal affect

there was a 17-year old boy who had a 2-year coke addiction. his brain was permanently altered by the experience and he now has no sense of time. that's lost to him now.

i think i'm using sleep as a defense mechanism to hide from my waking life. but then again, maybe that's what sleep is for. like, biologically.

i already wake up every morning feeling like i have a hangover, so i probably shouldn't start drinking. either that, or i have no reason not to.

long-form writing will soon be obsolete

i slept with michelle obama. in fact, barack obama is me in blackface.
i cover the elderly in gasoline.
i have a degree in circumcision.
i jizz in the soup served to the homeless.
i sell crack to tiny children.

fill him up with spice, empty him of guilt.

i am a mighty genius of construction, piling infinitely many concepts on a foundation of running water.

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